Playing with the Girls

Here is a bizarre ending which illustrates that you must always be alert and understand the proceedings. We'll watch Al play it. He had stayed in a hand of three-card sub, playing for the high, and wasn't too happy about his prospects. One trade had already been made, and this was the layout:

It looked as though Eleanor would pitch the 4 to develop a low, and she didn't seem to have much competition. Paul was clearly playing high. Fred might toss either the 5 or the 9. If he held a low hole card he might become a low contender. The second trade cost eight cents. Freddie stayed for the bet. When it came time to trade, Fred ditched the 9. He received a 5 for three of a kind. Now Eleanor went into a huddle. Al knew that she was holding at least two pair and was debating whether to break them for low or compete against Fred for high. Two small pair is frequently a nuisance in this game. She went for the full house and didn't make it.

Paul broke for low. He pitched a jack. He pulled a jack! That's how the cookie crumbles.

Al now tossed his hole card and pulled a deuce. After a round of betting, the final 12-cent trade commenced with this layout:

Fred pulled a hole card. Eleanor got a 9 in place of her king.
Paul tossed the jack. He shuddered when another 3 came off the top of the deck. Al didn't even have to spend 12 cents to buy. He held a lock with a queen low!

Then there was the night the police were roaming the neighborhood. After some checking around us discovered that they were searching in the woods, an undeveloped tract, for some thieves. Marge turned pale. Her three youngsters were home alone and she was on her way. She and Bill owned the house that bordered the undeveloped tract. The ladies were all sympathetic. In the middle of a hand of twin beds, all the players picked up their chips, their rolled cards, their closed cards, the center cards, the chips in the pot, and the coffee pot, and moved a block up the hill. They arrived to find the children sound asleep. The seating arrangement, center cards and rolled cards were restored as before. Coffee was poured and the game resumed.

I am indebted to Peter Schwed of Simon and Schuster for the following suggestion. It seems most appropriate for social circumstances where it is a mixed game or where the players are at different income levels, or have inflated notions of their ability, or for a myriad of other reasons. Each player is permitted to select his own stakes. There might be three or four levels from which a choice is permitted. For example, the might select 2, 4, and 6 cents. Another permissible range might be 5, 10, and 15. The plunger might play 10, 20 and 30, and 20, 40 and 60 cents may be also permitted. Each player selects the level that particularly suits his fancy for the evening. An impecunious novelist would surely be a 2, 4 and 6 man. The hot-shot account executive might be expected to play for higher stakes but for a lark might also select 2, 4, and 6. He could then bet and raise with abandon, placing the big gamblers under severe pressure which would develop some unusual and striking end games.

Each person makes hid choice of stakes in privacy, recording it on a slip of paper. The folded slips are passed to the host in evening. The betting is generalized as one chip, two chips or three chips. Of course everyone comments at one time or another on the stakes he is playing -lying at times, perhaps telling the truth. When the play is completed each slip is opened. It would be a riot to see the hot-shot player lose after he has chosen high stakes.

This form of variable stakes requires either a bank or a banker. If the big gamblers win and the penny players lose, the bank loses. In the reverse case the bank would gain. If on person chooses to bank the game, he is gambling that the low stakes players will outplay the high-stakes players. One way to start such a game - which I am sure will provide many entertaining moments - is to have each couple chip in ten dollars. If the bank wins over a period of several months, it can then be used to finance an evening on the town. If it loses, the bank can be re-plenished by taxing the winners.